No Turtle For My Twink

My brother (the one that plays WoW) called me at work yesterday. The conversation went something like this:

Bro: Hey.
Me: Hey.
Bro: Soooo, I bought another box. (obvious sounds in background that he's in his car)
Me: (laugh) Like big box? How much is that?
Bro: Bout a hundred bucks. I'm not trying for the Turtle Mount anymore. The drop rate was terrible.
Me: (laughing)
Bro: Did I just say drop rate?
Me: Ya.
Bro: Oh and you can't have it at any level, you have to be level 20.
Me: What? Nobody said that. It was all "Turtle any level."
Bro: Yup. So no Turtle for my twink. I decided on the tabard. I went to order a box of the booster packs but Upper Deck was sold out.
Me: You should try eBay I bet it'd be way cheaper too.
Bro: Did that. In fact I even signed up for it. But while I was looking around I found a tabard for like 99 cents, no buyout. I didn't really want to buy it, cause it's like buying gold ((he doesn't think that's any fun)) but figured, hey it might be worth it for $0.99. So I bid on it.
Me: Nice.
Bro: No because I was immediately outbid. So I bid again. And I was immediately outbid again!
Me: (laughing) It's not like the WoW Auction House. You can put in a max bid and the game, I mean eBay, will keep bidding it up for you. It's not like there was some eBay alt at the other end of somebody's computer constantly outbidding you.
Bro:(laughing)
Me: As you were apparently sitting there waiting to outbid them.
Bro: Yeah, well I gave that up anyway and went all ((Delaney)) on it.
Me: As in?
Bro: I used their Store Locator thing and plotted out a bunch of stores to drive to in sequence on my way home from work. I figured I'd keep going til I found one that wasn't sold out.
Me: Nice. And...? (flipping through papers on my desk in case my boss walks by and sees I'm not working on the thing we need done asap)
Bro: Found it first store.
Me: Nice.

There was a whole section of the conversation that I don't remember the details well enough to recount with justice. I think I was actually paying attention to the paperwork I was shuffling in front of me too well, which turned out to be a good thing because my boss actually DID walk by.

Essentially the employees of the Comic Book Store where he first stopped thought the tabard was a Real-Life tabard and not an in-game item and therefore thought it was "over-the-top." My brother (I warn you we're a bitter folk) refrained from mentioning that as employees of a comic book store, they had long passed over-the-top. But he remembered he was standing there in same said comic book store making a goodly sized purchase himself so he really couldn't talk.

I decided not to traumatize my brother with the knowledge that one could indeed be more over-the-top by describing what a LARPer was, what they might do with a real-life tabard and that those employees may have been thinking that's what he was.

Me: So you gonna open all those up tonight?
Bro: Yup. I'm home now. Got some dinner and gonna dive in.
Me: Cool. Remember to bring some of those cards next time you come over so I can see what they look like.
Bro: Count on it. I want no evidence in my house that I ever had these.
Me: And yet the whole point of buying them is so that you can proudly display something from them in game.
Bro: Yup.

And so it went, probably with much more laughing on my part because my brother cracks me up. I also cleaned up the language (cursing is a bit of a sport among my siblings) but that's essentially it.

According to the calculations from wowinsider.com my brother should have enough points for his tabard with that box, but I'll hold my breath before declaring any of us done with the collectible cards.